Nine Fallen Rose Petals
by XJack'sPearlX
Summary: The Doctor had been too late. All those years of saving the universe countless times and he could not save her this one time. Now he had to live with the guilt an pain...He should have been used to this by now...but no matter how many times it happened the pain only seemed to worsen.
1. Rose Petals

The Doctor had been too late. All those years of saving the humans and the Earth and he could not even save her. The Doctor had failed. He had not reacted fast enough. It was like he was stuck in some sort of paralysis as he watched it all unfold before him. Time seemed to have slowed down all around him, weighing him down. Why hadn't he moved quickly enough? Why hadn't he reacted fast enough?

He still could not quite believe it had happened, he thought he had stumbled into a dream, but it had happened, no matter how much the Doctor wished it happened. He watched as she silently begged him with eyes welling with tears for him to save her. She did not even know what was happening to her. All she knew was that it hurt. He watched as Rose disintegrated into gold dust.

He had failed, the Doctor had failed.

Rose had saved the universe. A human had saved the universe, and he, The Doctor, a Time Lord, could not save her.

The time Vortex she had absorbed retreated back into the TARDIS, back to where it belonged, leaving the Doctor there in the wake of his companion's death, alone. So much pain ripped through his hearts. He did not even cry. It was so beyond that. Finally he stumbled into his TARDIS He had to leave, he had to get out of there.

…He had to tell Jackie Tyler what had happened…

But all he wanted to do was run.


	2. Chips, lots of them

He had told Jackie everything, It was the first thing he had done when he had finally dragged himself into the TARDIS, and as he expected she had hit him. Hard. She slapped him right across the face, but she didn't just do it once. No, she did it several times, then eventually she just lost the will to do so and just broke down into tears and racking sobs. She had screamed at him, telling him to get the hell out of her house and never come back. She told him to stay away from Mickey, she'd tell him. She just wanted the Doctor to leave.

And that is just what he did.

The Doctor left the familiar apartment like an emotionless cyborg. But really he was filled with turmoil and emotions circling around inside resembling vicious, fighting dogs that were trying to tear him apart from the inside out. He avoided going back to his TARDIS for a while. He had no idea where he'd go, or what he'd do. He just wanted to wander aimlessly on his feet. He just walked, his hands in his pockets, trying not to think of her, or what had happened to her. He still had yet to cry, and he didn't think he would. The pain and sorrow was just too much for that. Tears would not be able to do his emotions justice.

He walked until he was downtown, weaving through the massing throng of people. The Doctor steadied them all, taking in their faces and voices, the way they walked, talked, and laughed. They were all so happy…or sad…or sometimes deep in thought. Humans had always amazed him, always. Throughout centuries the human race survived, continuing to live through plagues, wars, invasions, economy crashes and the like. They lived through it all, always coming out fighting.

Rose had been an amazing fighter. She had been like no other and he could have traveled with her to the end of the universe and it was his fault she was gone now.

The Doctor found some tea shop and blindly walked through the door. He ordered the first thing he saw on the menu and went back out to sit at one of the tables under the sun. He didn't want to be inside, where it was quiet. He felt almost as if the noise of the bustling city was keeping him from breaking entirely. The noise kept him from retreating to far back into his own mind where he could destroy himself entirely.

Soon his tea arrived, and it was set down before him along with a bit of cream and a little stirring spoon. The Doctor thanked the barista without looking up and poured the cream into the tea, stirring it in all while continuing to stare into the crowd. The barista left him without a word, but before she could go back inside he hailed her attention once more, apologizing and asking for a pastry. She nodded and the Doctor looked up at her. She was blonde, like Rose, with blue eyes that looked a tad mischievous for a barista. She told him she would get him his pastry fresh, it looked like he needed a bit of holiday cheer.

The Doctor was confused, holiday cheer? He looked around, actually taking in the details of the growing throng. He hadn't noticed there was a bigger crowd out than usual. They were all carrying bright, colorful bags and wearing thick coats and hats. All around them decorations were hung to spread cheer through the city. The smell of baking and pine trees swirled along with the flurries of snow. Of course! It was the Christmas holidays. Oh poor Jackie…he had not even noticed the tree she had been decorating…

The Doctor took a scolding sip of his tea, trying to ignore the growing pain and hatred he felt toward himself. The barista had been quick, setting down a warm scone and a few cookies before him. "Free of charge." She told him, lightly patting his arm. She turned to leave again and the Doctor was left alone to enjoy his sweets.

He paid a generous tip when he was done and got up, shoving his hands deep into his pockets as he left. He had not noticed how freezing cold it was.

He made it deep into the mass of people, weaving through them all, hearing the holiday music and children crying out for toys and sweets. He stopped for a moment to listen to a group of Santas playing a lovely holiday tune. When they began to stop the Doctor waited with the crowd for them to begin a new song, but they never did. The crowd began to murmur curiously and disperse as the Santas lowered their instruments. The people backed away slowly. Something was not right with them. The Santas all turned to one man in particular it seemed, and the Doctor swallowed hard. It was him.

One of the Santas lifted its instrument like some sort of weapon, and to the crowd's astonishment it actually fired! Screams broke out and the crowd ran in all directions, desperate to get away. Lucky for them the Santas seemed only to be interested in the Doctor. Unluckily for him that was…

He took off in the opposite direction, pushing through the crowd, trying to get out of their sight so they would stop firing. It would not be long before someone got hurt. The Doctor was gritting his teeth. Would he ever just have a moment to mourn? Was he always to be thrown into these situations? The Doctor ran down a smaller street that was much less populated, however he found himself suddenly facing another group of Santas and behind him the originals were marching upon him. He was trapped. So he resorted to what he always results to in these situations. He yelled at them.

"What do you want? Why are you firing into a crowd of innocent people? Who are you?" He shouted at them at the top of his lungs. His frustration and anger were reaching their breaking point. He just really could not handle this today. He had just need one day, one day of bloody peace!

His demanding questions seemed to stall them a moment and they all just stared. However none answered and after a few moments they lifted their weapons once again. The Doctor readied his sonic screw driver, ready to do battle when he was suddenly yanked out of the street by a small pair of hands. The Doctor stumbled back as a door was slammed. He had not even noticed the door! He turned to his savior, almost shocked to see it was the barista from earlier.

"This way!" She whispered and led him to the back of the café from earlier. He must have made his way down the familiar street without realizing it. He followed her as she led him behind the counter and through the back, out another, thicker door. They came out into a mall, filled with people all shopping and enjoying the festivities. They were still unaware of the chaos erupting outside, but this would not be the case for long. All the lights in the mall shut off without preamble, one second it was as bright as a sunny day and everyone was chatting and laughing happily, the next the lights were cut off and screams erupted. The entire mall's power had been cut and people were panicking, running into one another and crying names out desperately. The Doctor fumbled for his sonic screw driver, but could not find it. He could barely locate his pockets.

He felt a hand thrust into his and heard the familiar voice of the barista shout, "come on!" and she tugged him through the violent crowd. Somewhere amidst the screaming the Doctor heard the song the Santas had been playing outside. They had come into the mall and shut off the power! The Doctor continued to look for his screwdriver, but between being tugged along and people running full force into him, it was impossible to even begin to locate the device. It would certainly help, but in this throng someone may crash into him and cause him to drop it.

However the barista seemed to know where she was going. She tugged him along, encouraging him to keep his other hand out to feel for any obstacles. The Santas had yet to locate them and had yet to attack. They must not know he was there and were therefore not attacking. That was good…now they only needed to escape the pitch blackness of the mall. All around them people were still screaming and crying out, trying desperately to find eachother, or the exits. Somehow the call went out, everyone needed to head outside. There at least the street lights shown and families could be reunited. The Doctor and the barista were soon taken up in the wave of people. Their hands stayed connected, but they no longer had any control on their direction. Flashlight beams began to wave by the exit door, however they did not last long and they too were soon shut off by the same force that shut down the mall.

But it was all the shoppers needed. They had their direction, and they swept The Doctor and his sudden companion up with them, spilling out into the cold evening outside. Cries of relief were taken up and friends and family were reuniting. No one had been hurt, only a little shaken up. Security personal were walking through the crowd, checking to make sure everyone was alright and if they needed medical attention. Unnoticed by the relieved shoppers the santas and their instrument weapons were filing out behind them.

The Doctor and the barista did not hesitate to get out of there as quickly as possible. They went unseen and melded easily back into the bustling streets. They could afford to slow down a moment and catch their breaths. The mob enclosed them, cloaking them in a veil that kept them hidden from their pursuers.

The barista turned to him, panting from their constant running, "so stranger, these…Santas seem rather keen in getting you." She said with a questioning tone. She was studying the Doctor, who, with two hearts, was not struggling near as much as she was. Her gaze wasn't mistrusting or anything of the sort. She just seemed curious, wandering what a normal bloke like him could have done to have caused these Santas to chase after him. "Have you done anything to deserve this then?"

The Doctor shook his head, "not that I know of…or not yet anyway." He received a confused look from the barista girl, but did not elaborate. At present the less she knew the better. He scratched the back of his head, feeling acutely awkward for the first time in some years.

"Do you have a place to stay then? Where do you live?"

The Doctor felt his hearts drop. His TARDIS was across town, by Jackie's apartment. He couldn't go back there…so he thought of a lie off the top of his head, "I ah…was just kicked out of my home." He muttered, not able to meet the barista's gaze.

Music wafted over the sea of moving heads, and with a start the two recognized the tune immediately. The santas were on the trail once more, and coming up fast. The barista shoved her hand back into the Doctor's, just as she had at the mall, and gave him a single nod of her head. "Alright then, you'll stay with me for now." And they took off running, hand in hand.

Getting out of a calm, leisurely crowd was a lot harder than one might think. It was impossible to move through it, as no one seemed inclined to get out of the way. Where in a panicking crowd the throng is moving with some semblance of speed, these happy holiday shoppers did not care to move faster than a snail's pace as they admired the holiday scenery. They struggled, percervering and refusing to stop for any reason, pushing people out of their way and apologizing profusly as they went along.

Somehow they managed to make their way out of the suffocating mass of peopl and out onto less populated streets. However they waisted no time and continued to run, hands still locked together as they ran down the darks roads. The Doctor let the barista lead him all the way to her apartment complex. These were spacious and much nicer then Rose's had been, with lights twinkling up every story, winking down at them merrily. Inside it was just as welcoming. The main lobby had christmas lights hung all around and a tall christmas tree with every inch of it's branches decorated. The barista did not pause and led him up the stairs, avoiding the elevator. They passed several floors until they were about halfway up the building. The Doctor was having no problems with his two hearts barely pumping, but the barista was not having as much of an easy time. She was obviously not used to all this running and probably took the elevator regularly to begin with and only had one heart, but she pushed herself up the stairs, pushing a door open at the fifth level, pulling them into a long, wide corridor.

Turning right the barista took the Doctor straight down the hallway, took a left and counted three doors before stopping before one with the numbers 513 emblazoned acrossed its wooden surface. She pushed the door open and from inside the noise of a tv could be heard, along with banging and crashing coming from the kitchen. The Doctor closed the door behind him, slowly following the girl down the entrance hallway, which led straight to the living room with the kitchen connected right to it. It looked like there was meant to be space for a dining room, but they seemed to only use it for more space in the living room. To the right of the Living room was another small hallway, which the Doctor guessed led to the bedrooms and bathroom.

A woman sat on the large couch taking up most of one wall in the living room, watching a rather nice flat screen. What show she was watching the Doctor couldn't tell, it had something to do with people hopping across a giant obsticle course. She was blonde, like the barista, her hair as thick and as his savior's as well. He could tell the woman was tall, even as she lay there, and would have guess she were the barista's mother easily, until that is, he saw the other occupant of the appartment.

Another crash came from the kitchen and the Doctor saw another woman jerk to catch a toppled pan, and she looked exactly like the woman on the couch! Of course they were twins, but now the Doctor could hardly guess their relation. Thankfully the barista solved the small mystery with her introductions.

"Aunt Mary, I brought a friend home. He'll be staying with us for a bit, is the gust room alright for him to sleep in?" She had caught her breath and now the only evidence left of her physical exertion was the rosy coloring of her cheeks.

The woman on the couch, Aunt Mary, turned and gave them both a hearty smile, "oh Howie! There you are, Lucy and I were getting a little worried about you! We expected you home from work a few hours ago!" Aunt Mary exclaimed, standing and taking the Doctor in. "Who is this then? A friend you say? Why have we never seen him before?" She held out a hand for him to shake. "What's your name then?"

"John, John Smith," The Doctor lied easily, taking her hand and smiling for the first time that night. Mary shook his hand with great vigour and took no notice of the overly common name. She only gestured to the kitchen before speaking once more.

"Well you heard my name, Mary, and in there is my twin sister Lucy. We're Howie's aunt's, Mary and Lucy Edwards." Mary was very talkative, the Doctor could already tell. Mary went to the Kitchen, poking her head in, "Lucy, prepare dinner for four and come out and meet Howie's friend!"

There was a clang and Lucy dashed out of the kitchen, a wide smile on her face. The twins were identical indeed, and both shared strong characteristics with Howie. "Hello! She greeted, shaking his hand with slightly less vigour than her twin. Mary told her his name, filling her in on the situation.

"Oh of course! Any friend of Howie's is welcomed here! Of course, please no offense, she's never mentioned you before, and usualy she is quite a chatter box when it comes to her 'friends.' How long have you known our Howie for?"

The Doctor glanced down at the barista, finding her rosing flush was deepening with her aunt's words. She had remained silent through all of this, obviously trying her best to ignore her aunt's and their embarrasing questions. "We have only known eachother a little while. I have been met with a few troubles and...Howie is only helping me out." He struggled saying her real name instead of 'the barista'. It was a rather odd name too...Howie, wasn't that meant for boys?

Suddenly the smoke detector went off in the kitchen and Lucy let out a yelp, dashing back into the kitchen to save whatever had set the thing off.

The bari- Howie took the oppertunity to grab the Doctor's hand and make a run for it. "Best show you to your room." she muttered, barely getting the words out before tugging the Doctor dwn the adjacent hallway. The guestnroom was toward the back, across from the bathroom, "sorry, it may not be the best." she apologized, stepping into the room and opening herarms in a 'well here it is' gesture. The Doctor looked about the space. It was pretty basic. Roomy for an apartment with a chest of drawers, telly and a twin bed. the walls were merely an easy shade of green with no embelishments. It was a nice room for a guest.

The Doctor gave Howie a quick smile, "this will do nicely." He assured her, sitting down on the bed.

Howie looked relieved, "Oh, and sorry about my aunts, I know they can be a little." She wiggked her fingers and made a silly face, indicating their rather eccentric nature. The Doctor chuckled.

"That's alright, though, I hope you don't mind me asking, why do you live with your Aunts?" The Doctor asked, his curiousity always causing him to bypass privacy.

Howie didn't seem to mind however, and answered withot hesitation, "my parents are both living in Ireland, but it was a little too slow for me, so I came here to live with my aunts."

That made sense to the old Time Lord, but he had one more question, "and your name? Howie?" He thought it could have been a human thing, but it seemed to him it was an odd way to name your daughter, even for humans.

Again Howie did not mind and merely shrugged, "my mother is weird, those are her sisters if that helps any."

"Ah, of course!" It made a little more sense to the Doctor now.

Howie grinned, "your name isn't John Smith is it?"

The Doctor smiled, "no."

Howie opened her mouth as if she wanted to ask him more, but from up the hall came a shout.

"Ok, I burnt dinner! What do you want from the burger joint up the street?" Howie rolled her eyes, it was her Aunt Lucy, and by her expression the Doctor could tell this was not the first time this had occured.

"Chips, lots of them." The Doctor told her, lieing back on his bed with his hands folded on the back of his head.

With a smile and a shake of her head, Howie went to tell her aunt their orders, trying to hold back teasing her aunt for yet again, burning dinner, and with a guest in the house too!


End file.
